It is so easy to take our body for granted. It just does what we want, right? When we really take time to think about all the things that our body does for us, wow, how amazing it is. How often do you thank your body for all that it does for you?
I believe that given the right environment, our body can heal and be healthy. When I say the right environment, I mean how we nourish and nurture it through the authentic kindness of our mind: through the relationship of acceptance with our emotions, through expanding our awareness of how we are much more than just our physical self, the exercise we take and how we nourish ourselves through the food that we eat, through to the company that we keep and the energy we surround ourselves with and through living as our authentic selves. Sounds easy when it is said quickly!
Over generations, we have been fed limitations on what is acceptable physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually, digested them and believed other’s projections to be the truth, submitting to cultural beliefs and values. The belief in the power of the mind has taken over from trusting the body. The result of this is we have learnt to disconnect from our true selves. From a physical perspective, not to accept and like our own bodies. Add a dose of emotions we don’t like or feel comfortable with, and hey presto we have a recipe for a complete disconnect from our physical selves.
How often do you sit and pay attention to what your body is telling you through your emotions and sensations?
Do you actually like the body that you live in, or do you prefer to cover it up and make it look pretty to hide that it doesn’t feel pretty underneath?
We need our body to experience and learn the lessons we came into this lifetime to learn. When our house or car needs work done, we invest our time, energy and money on servicing and repair work. Our body needs that same attention and looking after too. Our body is the home for our soul in this lifetime. I love this quote by the French philosopher, Pierre Teilhard de Chardin:
We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.
Do you take time to nourish and nurture your body?
How often do you ask your body what it truly wants or needs?
The body holds so much wisdom that it is communicating with us every minute of every day. It is our Sat Nav system, our emotions communicate with us and help us meet our needs: they help us to survive, they allow us to relate and communicate with others, and they guide us. Unresolved emotional pain manifests in the body as physical pain. We need to tune into our bodies to understand the physical pain, then to realise the message it has for us.
Eight years ago, I was diagnosed with breast cancer, then three years later skin cancer. Up until that point, I took my body for granted and never looked after it. I abused my body in so many ways: junk food, I smoked, I drank excessive amounts of alcohol, I pushed myself to the limit physically, and I hated my body. All of these were coping mechanisms to avoid painful feelings. I neglected myself physically. I had never been taught to develop a relationship with my body and emotions. Cancer was my body’s way of telling me that I really needed to stop and change. To change my relationship with myself and my body, a wake-up call to myself to reconnect, body, mind and soul. I feel incredibly grateful to my body for teaching me a different way of being and living.
Our body is the window to our soul, and intuition helps us to know something and bypasses the conscious mind. Our mind can talk us into and out of anything. Developing intuition, understanding that inner code, that sense and knowing, that hunch, gut instinct, nagging voice, guides us to make the decisions that are right for us, helps keep us safe and helps us navigate through situations. Everyone has different ways that their intuition communicates with them. If you are not used to listening in this way, it is like learning a new language only it is your unique language for your body.
How often do you thank your body for all that it does for you?
Do you need to stop taking your body for granted and start listening and nourishing it instead?
We can never be deceived by our bodies, as our bodies never lie. Trust that your body is a source for intuition. Trust that your body is a source of valuable information and trust that your body holds all the wisdom to guide you. Trusting in our bodies, emotions, and intuition gives us a more grounded, surer sense of who we are: the authentic self. How amazing is it to have our own internal Sat Nav system to guide us through our lives! How sad that at a very young age we learn to shut off from them, as though they are our enemy or only allow ‘positive’ emotions. We just need to tune in and listen, deeply listen.
Have you ever felt different to other people? Did you grow up feeling different to everyone else? Did you grow up knowing that you were different? Did you grow up feeling like you didn’t fit in and didn’t belong? Did you grow up feeling that difference was a bad thing? I did.
Society, family cultures, education create a one size fits all mentality. That to be accepted and acceptable we need to fit in. Many of us were not celebrated for who we are and allowed to be different. We all know that one size does not fit all. To ‘fit in’ we need to conform, to adapt. The trouble is when we adapt and conform we are doing it to suit someone else’s needs and inadequacies and not for ourselves.
When we adapt we neglect our authentic self, we are judging ourselves. We are taught this from a very early age in many different messages:
"What will the neighbours think?"
"Put other people first, it’s selfish to think of yourself!"
"Why can’t you be more like so and so?"
"Be quiet and do as you are told."
"No, it’s not like that, it’s like this!"
"This is the way we do it."
I am sure you can think of more family myths that you had in your family that became a belief system to adapt to. Sometimes we don’t even stop and think, "Is this my belief or someone else's?" Adaption creates anxiety about fitting in as we become preoccupied with how we appear to others, compare ourselves and seek approval. It also teaches us not to accept ourselves just as we are. Sometimes we can be so disconnected from our true self that we have no idea who we are anymore.
The trouble is when we truly don’t believe or think how we have been told to think, then we can believe that we are wrong and therefore something is wrong with us. This is when we can feel different and feel like we don’t fit in, inflicting a negative view on ourselves. What we don’t understand is that these ways are being imposed on us just like they were imposed on those imposing on us. People don’t like to change or do things differently in case it ‘rocks the boat’ or someone else won’t like it. It can seem easier to adapt with the perception of fitting in. Unfortunately when we do this we are neglecting our true selves.
Accepting yourselves stops that feeling of not fitting in. Accepting what you think and how you feel can be liberating. Don’t try to fit in for others as you fit in perfectly with you. Give yourself that permission to be you whatever that means for you. People secretly admire difference as an unexpressed part of themselves wanting to be expressed.
As Oscar Wilde wrote:
Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.
Shine, be you, there is no one else like you, the universe does not make mistakes, trust in your beauty, you are here to be different, be your unique self and make a difference in the world. Your energy is unique to the world and if you don’t share it we all miss out. We can only evolve through being different not through being the same. Each day choose to be who you truly are.
Do you ever have that part of you that really wants to do something and then you just feel a block of something that says I can’t? Sometimes I do. A tug of war starts between I really want to do it and I just can’t do it. So which do you listen to? Maybe for a while it’s to the part of you that says ‘I can’t do this’. When this happens to me, I find myself procrastinating and doing all the jobs that I have been putting off doing. A momentary feeling of delight with all the jobs I have done until I remember what it is that I really want to be doing. My heart sinks. The tug of war starts again, ‘come on just do it’ vs ‘I can’t’. A block that feels like a brick wall inside me. What’s behind this block? Fear, what ifs, anxiety, frustration, keeping me shut down, keeping me small. It’s courage I need, but what is courage anyway and where can I buy some because I’m not feeling it right now. Is courage an emotion that we actually feel anyway?
We can listen to the part of us that says ‘I can’ and we can listen to the part of us that says ‘I can’t’. Both are true depending on which voice we listen to. I really believe where our attention goes, energy flows so we create our own reality.
There are different definitions of what courage actually is. The Collinsdictionary.com states,
Courage as the quality shown by someone who decides to do something difficult or dangerous, even though they may be afraid.
Another definition from the Dictionary.com states,
Courage as the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear, bravery.
According to these contradicting definitions is courage with or without fear?
Courage is a curious word and has got me thinking. What does it actually mean? Do we ever ‘feel’ courageous. Do we ever think of ourselves as ‘courageous’? Is courage something we think we need to feel before doing something that we feel anxious about? Or do we only ever think that other people are courageous or have courage and not ourselves?
When we feel fear, we definitely do not feel brave or courageous so is it only when we do something we fear doing that means we are courageous, or can we still be courageous doing something that we didn’t fear doing? Maybe it’s both.
What makes my heart sing is; the root word for courage is Coeur, which is French for the word heart. The heart seeks truth. Seeking truth even when we feel fear, or even when we fear feeling fear. Speaking our truth and living in ways that are true to our own soul. They say that we either feel love or we feel fear and that we don’t feel the two together. What it seems to me this word is saying is that to be courageous is to feel fear and at the same time be driven by our heart, love, and do it anyway.
Courage is a love affair with the unknown
Psychotherapist, Vibrational Healer, Kundalini Yoga Teacher, Earth energy medicine explorer, Seeker of truth, Wild walker, Intuitively led, Exploring the expansive inner landscapes as the compass that guides us, Adventurer of life, Creating community connections.
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